Starving on Food Network

Making the rounds on the Internets — a bit of snark on Food Network.

A quick person-by-person:

– Alton Brown: The guy doesn’t mention Good Eats. Strange.

– Emeril: I see his point. Even if you don’t watch Emeril, it’s reassuring to know Food Network has an actual chef as an anchor.

– Bobby Flay: Interesting theory that Throwdown is Food Network’s way of publishing Flay. I doubt that, but it’s interesting. I do miss Flay’s actual cooking shows — Hot off the Grill and the terrific odd-coupling (Flay with his megagrills, older guy with a little circular charcoal 1970s model) of Grillin’ and Chillin’.

– Giada: Absolute agreement here. Though some say no one watches her show for the cooking, I’d venture to say her cooking show is more popular than her travelogues. Bottom line for Giada, Alton, Flay and others — I have no interest in watching you eat. None.

– Rachael Ray: I sympathize with the complaints of overexposure, and she’s the queen of the “watch me eat” shows. But I don’t buy into the griping about 30 Minute Meals. She’s sharing quick tips for people who have no time. That’s most of us.

I see the basic complaint. The personalities are pushing aside the chefs, and that’s a bad thing.

If I had anywhere to sell it, I’d write a piece about cable networks and their inevitable descents into cheap crap.

– A&E went from actual arts and entertainments to a dumping ground for reruns.

– Bravo sewed up the gay-friendly audience and then went all-reality, more or less.

– Discovery Channel isn’t quite as high-brow as it used to be, but I’ll give them credit for MythBusters. (Aside: Kari has joined the legion of women who have been made less attractive by their spread in Maxim. That’s a damn shame. Something similar happened to my generation’s Kari as well.)

– TLC. The “Learning” Channel. Yes, I’m majoring in What Not to Wear.

– C-SPAN was holding up pretty well until they did that reality show on Capitol Hill staffers. Can you believe Rachel stood up the majority whip to go out drinking with that guy from Homeland Security?

OK, I made up the last one. Just wanted to see if you were still reading.

At least History Channel still shows history, and Ovation has a fair amount of music. Quick word of warning on the latter, though — if you see them advertising an interview with your favorite singer or band, it might be a few years old. Say, 10. Or 15.

Guess you get what you pay for.


2 thoughts on “Starving on Food Network

  1. The major networks bought the cable channels to have outlets for their back library, just as Ted Turner created Turner Classic Movies to have a way to monetize his purchase of MGM. They’ve just cut the hell out of the time lapse between original airing and rebroadcast. (Down to about 24 hours in some cases.)

    The descent is steep, too. When she was in high school, my niece used to watch ER shows on TLC because she wanted to be a nurse. Now she’s an ER nurse, and the only surgery you see on TLC now is ceiling-fan-ectomies.

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